Honor Sources and Codes
As they encourage group cohesion in addition to motivating preferred behavior, honor codes are well worth including in any intentionally designed or reinforced culture. Strictly enforced honor codes can even impart competitive advantages to cultural adherents. For example, prejudiced people are much more likely to trust Mormons with upper management positions, Jews with managing their financial assets, and Jains with their accounting in part because those cultures’ respective honor codes have created stereotypes which can make life easier for members of those cultures in certain professions.
The Holy Grails of a cultural honor code are:
- To create one sufficiently cohesive to generate beneficial stereotypes about adherents who follow it (i.e., that they can be trusted to perform well in certain high-paying positions)
- To create one differentiated enough that people understand how your people are “weird” and whether they would be a good potential sociological match for your group. Generic, “be a good person” stuff is pointless—your honor code must differentiate your culture so there is a sense of group identity.
- To create one strict enough that a person can regularly get the cognitive rewards associated with making sacrifices. If the sacrifices an honor code requires are rare, adherents won’t develop the mental fortitude they need to always follow it.
- To create one thorough enough that true adherents function dramatically better when working together than a random group of outsiders would.
What values do we emphasize in our House’s honor code? Though we have shared ours below, we highly doubt this honor code would be interesting to many readers. We primarily left it here to make it easier for our great-grandkids to find should they be interested in how we thought about this kind of stuff if their parents have since created totally new Houses.
An Honor Code Sample: House Collins’ Honor Code
Fiduciary Responsibility matters above all other concerns.
This makes people much more likely to trust you with investments. It is also probably one of the oldest and most core obsessions of our family and something for which we are already known.
If someone takes a risk on you, don’t let them down. That doesn’t mean you always make them money, but it does mean that so long as they are invested in you, you are an agent of theirs within that part of your life with no split allegiance. When our travel company was thrashed by the pandemic, we cut our own salaries to zero before lowering a single employee’s pay or bonuses, then we spent two years working to save the company without pay.
When our board offered to renegotiate the terms of our contract to be more generous, we told them we wouldn’t entertain the discussion until the company was on stable ground again, as we are honor-bound to not negotiate a contract with an investor who has no negotiating power (had we left the company during that period, it would have collapsed). Our brother and sister-in-law work in the same industry and developed a similar reputation, refusing to take a bonus from their board despite outperforming every metric for years in a row. As a member of House Collins, the level of fiduciary responsibility you hold should look stupid to people of other cultures.
This is one of those aspects of an honor code that directly and massively benefits not just the larger cultural group but you as an individual. While our obsession with looking out for the best interests of those who take a personal risk on us can seem dumb at the moment, it is something people really remember and a short-term financial hit will always be trivial when contrasted with access to a larger capital pool for future projects and the trust of your employees.
Have complete emotional control at all times.
This means two things: Never allow emotion to pollute any major life decision you make and attempt to maintain whatever emotional state will help you toward your goals. This generally means you should always be happy and full of energy when around others because that is usually the most efficacious emotion to have in order to achieve your aims.
Emotions are a tool, not a compass. Emotions are an evolutionary artifact that is a pollutant within the human soul but one that can nevertheless be utilized to influence others and achieve desired outcomes.
The trials you face in life can either strengthen you or make you fragile. People without your best interests at heart will always attempt to use these experiences as an excuse to get you to indulge in non-efficacious emotional states. Hardship is never an excuse for fragility in our House.
Happiness is a reward, not a destination.
The most toxic message taught to kids in our society is that happiness warrants pursuit.
The message goes: Once a simple set of conditions are met, a person naturally starts to feel happy, content, and satisfied. Thus, when a person does not feel those emotional states, they desperately try to change things until they do, whether that be what they are doing, where they are living, how much they make, who they are with, or who they are themselves.
Lasting contentment and satisfaction—the forms of happiness our House values—are always the result of competent pursuit of one’s values.
Perhaps we are not told this obvious truth because secular society has a phobia around allowing people to search for their own values and nudges people to value positive emotions in both themselves and others, like some sort of puerile utilitarian accountant, to prevent them from asking questions.
Always take responsibility for failures.
You may be told that a failure is “not your fault” because of X or Y reason. Accepting that lie robs you of potential lessons and will make those around you respect you less. Take responsibility for failures. Sometimes people who are emotionally attached to you will tell you to avoid taking responsibility for failure because they think it will help make the pain go away, a pain they share through empathy. Learn to make the pain go away by controlling your emotions, not by avoiding responsibility.
For example, when the pandemic eviscerated the travel industry it would have been easy for us to frame the loss as an “act of God” to our investors, but we didn’t. There is always something we could have done. We could have predicted risks like the pandemic and better communicated them or put more controls in place to lessen the risk by diversifying the company out of the travel industry before the pandemic.
When Nokia failed and was shutting down, the CEO said, “We didn’t do anything wrong.” Never be that person. Never be the leader who doesn’t take responsibility for their failures.
Family and House come first.
Your family and other members of your culture should be given preference over friends and strangers (but never investors or those that have otherwise put their faith in you, such as employees).
There is, however, an important exception to this rule: Incompetent or unethical family members are owed nothing. Only successful family members who have demonstrably operated by our House’s Code of Honor are to be given preference. This standard is not about developing a safety net for the weak, as some cultures interpret family-first action, but rather a network of competent people that compound each other’s successes. One of any individual’s highest objectives should be to expand the family in terms of number of members, competency of those members, and their power and wealth.
Make sure family members know when they have been deemed non-efficacious or unethical. Never pretend they are in your good graces to manipulate them.
Always understand a family member is doing you a favor by letting you know you are not approved. Rather than judge them negatively, work out what steps are necessary to get back in their good graces and decide whether the action required is worth your time.
“I will,” rather than IQ, should be a source of pride.
Growing up, my (Malcolm’s) mom refused to share my test results or IQ with me. While I knew they must be high because I was always in whatever gifted programs the school would offer, my mother, when asked about it, would redirect me to some area where I had failed through a lack of work ethic, planning, or perseverance and remind me that “I will,” not IQ is what matters in life.
She would remind me that plenty of losers had a high IQ—that history was defined by those with a force of will and that there is no greater honor than to work yourself to death in pursuit of a worthy goal. As Spartan mothers used to tell their children, “With it or on it”—return from war with your shield or as a carcass carried back on it—but never even consider abandoning your station in life.
Anyone can define themselves as smart and misunderstood and then feel upset that things did not come to them easily because they thought the world respected this imaginary self-perspective. As a House, we value cunning and work ethic—never “smarts.”
Given the mindset with which I was raised, meeting Simone, who lived by the personal philosophy of “repeated blunt force,” was a breath of fresh air. In Silicon Valley, people valued IQ, burn-out culture, and over-the-top personalities. Simone was the first person I had met who truly understood the value of quiet, consistent, hard work. Bragging about how hard one is working or how stressed out one is (burn-out culture) is just as bad as bragging about high IQ—just do what you must and don’t wince no matter how hard life punches back.
Force of will and work ethic in yourself and others should be respected over natural intelligence. This is true of yourself, your heroes, your colleagues, and your partners in life. No one is more deserving of contempt than a smart person who squandered that potential by being lazy or fragile.
Don’t trust authority; contribute new ideas.
It is a deep Calvinist tradition to distrust authority outside of your immediate community—while utilizing a strict chain of command within the community and family structure. The key that makes this work is the chain of command used within the community, which fervently rewards out-there or otherwise non-orthodox ideas and only tells people what to do, not how to think.
While we’ve passed a century or so during which this trait was not beneficial, growth of the cultural supervirus stoked by population collapse will make it invaluable again in the near future. As we begin to see more tyrants rise to power across the political spectrum, a healthy suspicion of any demagogue or bureaucracy will be critical. While this approach places headwinds on anyone going through the traditional school system or careers, we are building a new school system and we believe the traditional job market is about to undergo a major change.
Live by the Pragmatic Model (live intentionally).
Finally, and most obviously, live intentionally as outlined in The Pragmatist’s Guide to Life.
This entails choosing:
- What you think has value
- How you can effectively manifest that set of values
- What sort of person you want to be
- How you want others to see you
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[[4]](#_ftnref4) Ok, E., Qian, Y., Strejcek, B., & Aquino, K. (2021). Signaling virtuous victimhood as indicators of Dark Triad personalities. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 120(6), 1634–1661. https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000329
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[[8]](#_ftnref8) Ok, E., Qian, Y., Strejcek, B., & Aquino, K. (2021). Signaling virtuous victimhood as indicators of Dark Triad personalities. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 120(6), 1634–1661. https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000329 from https://www.gwern.net/docs/psychology/personality/2020-ok.pdf
[[9]](#_ftnref9)Clark, C. (2022, August 3). The evolutionary advantages of playing victim. Quillette. from https://quillette.com/2021/02/27/the-evolutionary-advantages-of-playing-victim/
[[10]](#_ftnref10) Gabay, R., Hameiri, B., Rubel-Lifschitz, T., & Nadler, A. (2020). The tendency for interpersonal victimhood: The personality construct and its consequences. Personality and Individual Differences, 165, 110134. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2020.110134 from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886920303238
[[11]](#_ftnref11) For data set: https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/dataset/covid-19-late-march-2020/ For data set analysis: https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1248823584111439872.html
[[12]](#_ftnref12)Pew Research Center. (2020, August 27). Are we happy yet? Pew Research Center’s Social & Demographic Trends Project. from https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2006/02/13/are-we-happy-yet/
[[13]](#_ftnref13)Sullivan, D., Landau, M. J., Branscombe, N. R., & Rothschild, Z. K. (2012). Competitive victimhood as a response to accusations of ingroup harm doing. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 102(4), 778–795. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0026573
[[14]](#_ftnref14)Brown, R. M., & Craig, M. A. (2020). Intergroup Inequality Heightens Reports of Discrimination Along Alternative Identity Dimensions. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 46(6), 869–884. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167219880186
[[15]](#_ftnref15)Rousseau, B. (2016, December 16). Napping in public? In Japan, that’s a sign of diligence. The New York Times. from https://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/16/world/what-in-the-world/japan-inemuri-public-sleeping.html
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[[17]](#_ftnref17)Bullock, O. M., Colón Amill, D., Shulman, H. C., & Dixon, G. N. (2019). Jargon as a barrier to effective science communication: Evidence from metacognition. Public Understanding of Science, 28(7), 845–853. https://doi.org/10.1177/0963662519865687
[[18]](#_ftnref18)Says:, J., says:, J. W. A., says:, K. W., says:, L. F. S., says:, W., Says:, N., says:, C. V., says:, _cautionary_tale_, says:, M. M. N., says:, N., & Says:, G. (n.d.). Can Jehovah’s Witnesses go to college? JW Answers. 2022, from https://jwanswers.com/can-jehovahs-witnesses-go-to-college/
[[19]](#_ftnref19)This article also discusses how, while Israeli Haredi women can undertake high school, many of their schools will not grant them degrees: “Rabbis called for Jewish women to desist from studying in any higher education institutions, including religious seminaries, that offer an academic diploma. They also stated that offering the bagrut (matriculation diploma) in high school is strictly forbidden, and students should not be taking matriculation tests independently.” Chizhik-Goldschmidt, A. (2015, December 25). Despite decrees, Jewish ultra-Orthodox women still quietly studying for degrees. Haaretz.com. from https://www.haaretz.com/jewish/2015-12-25/ty-article/.premium/despite-decrees-haredi-women-still-studying-for-degrees/0000017f-f7ba-d887-a7ff-fffe683e0000
[[20]](#_ftnref20)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMG0lc_6NiI&t
[[21]](#_ftnref21)Shlezinger, Y. (2021, February 26). Record 63.5% of Haredim join Israel’s workforce in 2020. Israelhayom.com. from https://www.israelhayom.com/2021/02/26/record-63-5-of-haredim-join-israels-workforce-in-2020/
[[22]](#_ftnref22)Perlmutter, E. (1974, December 26). Hasidic sect hurt by unemployment. The New York Times. from https://www.nytimes.com/1974/12/26/archives/hasidic-sect-hurt-by-unemployment.html
[[23]](#_ftnref23) Newman, M., et al. (2019, May 8). State Watchdog gives Haredi colleges failing grade over sky-high dropout rates. The Times of Israel. from https://www.timesofisrael.com/state-watchdog-gives-haredi-colleges-failing-grade-over-sky-high-dropout-rates/
[[24]](#_ftnref24) Bellafante, G. (2016, September 2). In Brooklyn, stifling higher learning among Hasidic women. The New York Times. from https://www.nytimes.com/2016/09/04/nyregion/in-brooklyn-stifling-higher-learning-among-hasidic-women.html
[[25]](#_ftnref25)Tyler, N., Heffernan, R., & Fortune, C.-A. (2020). Reorienting locus of control in individuals who have offended through strengths-based interventions: Personal agency and the good lives model. https://doi.org/10.26686/wgtn.12956984.v1 from https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.553240/full, Krause, N., & Stryker, S. (1984). Stress and well-being: The buffering role of locus of control beliefs. Social Science & Medicine, 18(9), 783–790. https://doi.org/10.1016/0277-9536(84)90105-9 from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/0277953684901059,
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[[29]](#_ftnref29) According to Charles Burney, whose History of Music (1776) was the first important treatise in its field, Calvinists disallowed all instrumental music in Geneva for 100 years after the Reformation and all music, except for psalm singing, was outlawed. Later scholars have argued this to be an exaggeration, but one that contains more than a grain of truth.
[[30]](#_ftnref30) Curry, A. (2017, November 5). Ancient sites damaged and destroyed by ISIS. National Geographic. from https://www.nationalgeographic.co.uk/history-and-civilisation/2017/11/ancient-sites-damaged-and-destroyed-by-isis
[[31]](#_ftnref31) Time Inc. (1978, October 2). Behavior: Analyzing jewish comics. Time. from https://content.time.com/time/subscriber/article/0,33009,948701,00.html
[[32]](#_ftnref32) While Willoughby Britton has done some interesting research in this space, we would suggest this blog post by someone struggling even four years after quitting meditation: https://hollyelmore.substack.com/p/i-believed-the-hype-and-did-mindfulness-meditation-for-dumb-reasons-now-im-trying-to-reverse-the-damage
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[[38]](#_ftnref38) If you’re not familiar with this technique and want to learn more, we recommend the Wikipedia page as a jumping off point: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lost_in_the_mall_technique
[[39]](#_ftnref39) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramona_false_memory_case
[[40]](#_ftnref40) Hughes, K. C., & Shin, L. M. (2011). Functional neuroimaging studies of post-traumatic stress disorder. Expert review of neurotherapeutics, 11(2), 275–285. https://doi.org/10.1586/ern.10.198
[[41]](#_ftnref41) Studies and clinical trials evidence the Sinclair method. Sinclair Method UK TSM Consultation Service. (2022, March 18). from https://www.sinclairmethoduk.com/studies-and-clinical-trials-evidence-the-sinclair-method/
[[42]](#_ftnref42) We arrived at this figure from a back-of-the-napkin calculation that 95,000 die of alcoholism-related diseases every year, the Sinclair method works in 80% of cases and is extremely cheap—cheaper than alcoholism even if you are only drinking mouthwash like the Unabomber (the cheapest over-the-counter way to get drunk)—thus, AA needlessly leads to the deaths of around 0.7M people a decade.
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[[45]](#_ftnref45) For data set: https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/dataset/covid-19-late-march-2020/ For data set analysis: https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1248823584111439872.html
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[[47]](#_ftnref47) Napier, J. L., & Jost, J. T. (2008). Why are conservatives happier than liberals?. Psychological science, 19(6), 565–572. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2008.02124.x, Liberal countries have more satisfied citizens while Conservatives are happier individuals, study finds. (2014). PsycEXTRA Dataset. https://doi.org/10.1037/e527942014-001 from https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2014/09/satisfied-citizens, Bohannon, J. (2015, March 12). New study questions trope that conservatives are happier than Liberals … Science. from https://www.science.org/content/article/new-study-questions-trope-conservatives-are-happier-liberals
[[48]](#_ftnref48) Kirkegaard, Emil O. W.. (2020). Mental Illness and the Left. The mankind quarterly. 60. 10.46469/mq.2020.60.4.3.
[[49]](#_ftnref49) Dein, S. (2010, January 10). Religion, spirituality, and mental health. Psychiatric Times. from https://www.psychiatrictimes.com/view/religion-spirituality-and-mental-health
[[50]](#_ftnref50) Henderson, W. M., & Kent, B. V. (2021). Attachment to God and psychological distress: Evidence of a curvilinear relationship. Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, 61(1), 161–177. https://doi.org/10.1111/jssr.12767 from https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/jssr.12767
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[[80]](#_ftnref80) Note, this bullet and this footnote were written by one of our Chinese editors, Lillian Tara. “Historically, China was wracked with internal chaos that produced a much more conservative philosophy than seen in the West. Education was seen as integral to the highest value of social/moral order, both necessary for the individual to get ahead and for society at large to prosper. People frequently liken Chinese to Jewish culture, but the latter seems to have greater emphasis on open debate and the inherent value of discourse—while Chinese education values are more formally hierarchical and don’t have a divine, metaphysical backing. As discussed earlier, this may account for the abundance of Jewish public intellectuals and their more interdisciplinary success.”
Malcolm note: “Chinese cultural attitudes toward education are fascinating, as they give us a vision of where our current society might be headed. While the civil service exams were focused on practical knowledge when first implemented, over the centuries they became more about showing one’s skill at perfectly memorizing Confucian texts (essentially a proto liberal arts). This shift allowed education to still act as a filter for intelligence and work ethic but meant practical skills were no longer being emphasized. On the upside, this rendered the upper classes resistant to external cultural viruses but on the downside, it lowered the rate of cultural innovation because practical skills were no longer being emphasized.”
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[[167]](#_ftnref167) While we don’t see how this might benefit this culture, we wonder if the Japanese, either for genetic or cultural reasons, experience a stronger reminiscence bump than people in many Western cultures, as a uniquely strong reminiscence bump could explain why high school settings are so common in Japanese media.
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[[170]](#_ftnref170) Note: We tried to find any proof that this was true outside of cultural stereotypes but couldn’t, which makes it hard to pontificate on.
[[171]](#_ftnref171) We acknowledge that, at least when it comes to having kids, there is a certain amount of genuine, unconditional love that will never fade, despite what a child may do. This does not mean that a child is entitled to unconditional affection motivated by that love.